This Ratio Is The Key To A Happy Married Life
When you think about a happy married life, you don’t really correlate it with math. That’s most likely because math isn’t that romantic. But, one study proves that math may be more important in marriage than we all think. Researchers have discovered a ratio that could be the key to a happy married life.
Follow The 5:1 Ratio To Have A Happy Married Life
In 1976, Dr. John Gottman and Robert Levenson conducted a study with different couples. They asked the participants to solve an issue in their relationship within fifteen (15) minutes. They documented the experiment through videotapes. As they reviewed each recording and followed up with the couples nine years later, they were able to predict the couples who would last longer and those who would end up divorcing. Their accuracy percentage was around 90%.
So, how did they predict if a couple would last or not? It’s simple. They observed the balance or difference between happy interactions and unhappy ones during a conflict.
From their results, they came up with the 5:1 ration. This means that for every one unhappy interaction, the couple has to compensate with five happy ones to make the marriage last longer.
A Simple Example
To illustrate this ratio, let’s paint a scenario. Let’s say that you and your significant other are fighting over your parenting styles. During the fight, you exchange some nasty remarks. Both of your anger disperse and now you don’t know what to do to make everything better.
This is where the 5:1 ratio comes in. Generally, what you can do is perform five good deeds to each other. It can be making breakfast or doing laundry so that the other person can take a rest.
If, during the fight, you were able to do two negative interactions. You simply adjust the formula and make it 10:2.
Make It A Habit
It takes two to tango, of course, so the 5:1 ratio rule won’t be effective if only one person in the relationship is practicing it. Make sure that you have an understanding with your partner about this so both of you can make a habit out of doing good things for each other post-conflict.
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